boyfriend blues

Pao (my boyfriend) left for Bangkok today coz his company sent him. I'm really really happy and proud of him but the thing is he said he would go to my house before he left but he wasn't able to because the airport car was already there to pick him up. I was very disappointed at him for saying something and not staying true to his word. It's very very disappointing whenever that happens. I woke up this morning and the first thing I thought was I'm going to see pao today!! I look forward to it then it doesn't happen!!! It may seem shallow but that's the way I am, I look forward to a person's given word of what was promised to me will happen and I get let down and feel bad when it doesn't happen. Understand?

It makes me feel unimportant because someone could easily break an agreement with me. This is actually in general...

Sometimes I feel like I have to compete with everything in Pao's life. I may overexaggerate because right now I'm not doing anything (not busy at all) but you girls know that feeling when your center is your guy but it doesn't feel like your guy's center is you. Yup! My close friend in college felt that way all the time. Well, it may seem that but that's not the case all the time... Girls are just soooo extremely emotional when compaired to guys but they probabaly feel *something* too. They just don't show it because guys are just NOT emotional beings. (if he is, then think about that....) What's the point? Nothing! I am just releasing my frustrations in life!

Now, I feel better!